So my bakery roulette has been a little slack lately. But after what I tasted today I do not think I could handle such freakish treats every week. Today I took the plunge and went for a pastry adorned with one of the most deadly substances known to one’s palate… candy floss meat. The was covered all over a kind of sick Asian version of a Swiss roll. Horrifying. A layer of innocent, white sponge cake had been rolled up with flossy meat, spring onions and stuck together with some kind of animal fat. In the middle was a hard, thin centre that looked like two layers of pasta.
Behold the fuzzy sickness
I have had the unpleasant encounter with candy floss meat before in China. You pick the plainest bun in the shop, only to bite inside to have sugary meat cling to every crevice in your mouth. Even if you vigourously brush your teeth after, remnants of the stuff still linger for hours. I am not sure how they make it, but It is defiantly some kind of dried pork whipped into a weightless state with sugar. In one word. Gross.
I was feel particularly brave today and spied the arrogant looking thing in the middle of the shop. This cake/roll was pretty heavy, and I was intrigued as to what the centre might be. I could not go for a big bite. First of all I am mainly vegetarian so I could only handle a smidgen of this meat floss, but also a huge bite would have deposited the stuff all over the roof of my mouth. Not even for money would I do that. I prised open the the roll, watching in disgust as the fluffy meat sprayed out over the white sponge glistening with a layer of fat. I took a tentative nibble. All those memories of when I accidentally took a big mouthful of the substance came flooding back. But I was curious as to what the hard and dense centre was comprised of. It must be something savoury. Surely nothing sweet with all the meat. It was a solid almond pastry. Even though incredibly sweet, it had the potential to be nice on its own. Why would they ruin it but sticking it as the nucleus in some meat horror fest.
98% of the roll went into the bin. It would have been an insult had I offered the rest to any of my friends. When in Asia one should at least try the meat floss once. It is defiantly an experience your mount will not forget.
Surprise factor 7/10… There was meat floss everywhere so only the centre was a surprise.
Offensiveness 9.5/10 … I still feel sick
Taste 1/10… Only 1 point as the almond centre had potential
Likely hood to buy again 0%
Until next Wednesday….